Back On The Road

I’m all alone in the streets, walking towards the end of my humanity. The beast inside me awakens, desperately screaming and howling towards the moon, screaming for its lost love. It all turns into a cliche, but as usual, they’re always the good ones. You’ve seen and heard them a milion times, reading all that trashy love literature, because, isn’t the old one way too old to be read anymore. You’ve heard it one milion times in one milion songs and of course, you’ve seen it in all those shitty teen movies. It’s all crap, because it’s fun and games while you’re young and then it gets more and more depressing as you get older. Years pass, ages pass, and you’re still wishing and hoping you’ll get back together with your lost love, maybe the girl from your highshool, maybe the girl from next door, doesn’t really matter, she’s always the one that you love desperately and she always loves others, because you’re too fucking dumb to tell her. Because you’re a coward, of course, aren’t we all? And then you think that life sucks and there’s no reason to live anymore and you put a bullet in your head, if you live in America. If not, there always are good ways for a suicide. You can cut your wrists in the bathtub, but that’s too messy and it takes too long. You can take 20 diazepam’s with one sip of whisky on the rocks and end it in style. Or you can hang yourself in your father’s garage. Or just get on a bycicle and ride around through the town, you’re surely gonna get hit by a speeding car, because there are thousands of them.
That’s if you’re dumb enough to do that.
One of the most impressive quotes in one of my favourite shows sounded like this:
Daughter: “When does the pain go away?” (reffering to the broken heart pain”
Father: “If you’re lucky enough, never.”
So true, so goddamn true.
But hey. You’re young and confused and hormones go crazy all inside you and you don’t give a fuck. Or at least that’s what you think. But then you meet more and more girls, and each and every one of them is awesome, if you’re lucky enough. And then you start to get pissed and depressed and wonder, what the fuck is going on and why are you so goddamn pissed and confused? Because, you idiot, you fell a little bit in love with each and every one, and you can’t make your bloody choice. Even if you know what the correct choice would be, you wouldn’t do it. And you’re stressed out and you can’t sleep and you’re wondering.
Tell you what. Pick the one your heart tells you to. Pick the one that you know for sure, will make you the happiest man alive. And especially, pick the one that you can make happy, so that you can keep her.
And hold on to her and don’t dissapoint her. And grab on to her and love her. And if you really are lucky, she’s gonna be with you untill the end of your days. And if you’re not that lucky, at least you’ll have some fun.

Do not try to make a point out of this text. It has none. My head hurts, I’m confused, I can’t sleep and I’m sick and tired.

Thank you and good night.